Thank Dog for the Internet! by Kimberly Lang
19 Comments March 9th, 2010 in author, just for fun Posted by Amyby Harlequin Presents author Kimberly Lang
Writing is often a lonely occupation. The people in your head, while fascinating, can only provide a limited amount of company. I mean, it’s not like I can take my hero and heroine out to lunch and talk about the latest and greatest Hollywood scandal or ask their advice about what I’m planning to wear to the RT Convention. They won’t go shopping with me and talk me into buying those great boots. Or tell me that those pants really do make my butt look HUGE. (I’m crazy, but I’m not that crazy yet. The voices in my head aren’t that strong. I love my characters, and they may feel real at times, but I do understand they’re not really real people.)
Many writers are introverts, so the long hours alone are great for them. They thrive on it. Me, I’m an extrovert in a career where there’s no water cooler, no one in the office next door, no one to talk to when I take a break for lunch. Don’t get me wrong – I need the silence and solitude in order to write, but wandering through the house alone all day actually starts to wear on me after a while.
Thank dog for the internet! Thank dog for the social networking sites and writers’ loops which function as the break room for those of us who work at home (and can’t really leave the house because we haven’t bothered to shower or put on real clothes yet . Yeah, this is the glamorous life, folks!) And because the Presents authors are spread all over the world, there’s always someone somewhere ready to chat. If it’s midnight here and all my US author friends are asleep, the Aussies are awake down under where it’s tomorrow afternoon. And if I’m really pulling an all-nighter, by two am the Brits are up checking their email with their first cup of tea in hand. Of course, the downside is that there have been many mornings where I’ve gone to check my email first thing only to find that something important has happened while I slept and I’m now twenty messages behind!
How did writers survive before the internet? No, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know.
Being able to contact other authors is a blessing for newbie authors trying to swim in the deep end without a life jacket. I wouldn’t have wanted to go it alone. They keep you sane at the same time they tell you what you’re supposed to be doing and what’s coming around the bend next. (And, usually, they’re pretty forgiving of the overuse of exclamation points that just happen when Your! Book! Has! A! Cover!!!!!) They’re still important six, ten, thirty books down the road. They’re your coworkers as well as your support group. Sadly , though, there’s no Christmas Party.
Slightly off-topic tangent: I’m also quite lucky to have a good friend who also writes for Presents here in my hometown. I can honestly say I knew Lynn Raye Harris before she became Lynn-Raye-Harris-Who-Won-The-Instant-Seduction-Contest. 
Right now, Lynn lives four miles from my house. After I move into my new house on April 1st, she’ll be literally right up the street (walking distance actually, if I wasn’t completely lazy)! Lynn and I – for business purposes, only, of course – lunch a lot. It keeps the writing mojo flowing. Refills the well. In fact, my mojo feels a little sluggish and the well’s running low. I need to schedule a lunch date soon. (Hey, Lynn, call me!)
Even better, Lynn will go shopping with me and talk me into buying those great boots. Or out of buying those pants that make me look fat.
So, I have little reason to be lonely or curse the silence. My virtual friends are always around the water cooler waiting to chat about everything from books to life. It keeps me sane. Thank you, internet.
Now I just need to work on staying off the internet and finishing the book!
Out of curiosity, how many virtual friends do you have? Folks you know really well because you chat with them online all the time, but you’ve never heard their voice or seen them face-to-face?
Kimberly
Note: Kimberly’s latest North American release Magnate’s Mistress…Accidentally Pregnant! was out in February — watch for her next UK book What Happens in Vegas… from Modern Heat in August!
Tagged with: Kimberly Lang • life of a writer • Lynn Raye Harris
Ok, very jealous that you and Lynn live so close!
Kimberly this is a near and dear topic to me. Business that transpired while I slept? Check. When I sold this last book I got up at 3am to check on my boys (as you do) and checked my email only to discover I’d sold my book. uh…good luck with the sleeping thing.
I happen to be lucky enough to share a state with Lucy Monroe and a few other non-Presents authors, though I’ve not met Lucy yet since she’s five hours from me…but I *have* met her, along with most of the rest of you, via the Internet.
Also, I met my critique group right here on the ihearts boards (one of whom is the winner of the MH portion of the last comp, Gill Clegg, known to me as Jilly) and we span the globe (Ireland, UK, NZ, Aus, Oregon, Washington DC!!) and not only were they a huge part in my personal success story. And me keeping my sanity as I spend my days as a SAHM who then retreats to a small room to write when my husband is home!!
*side note, I’m a big time extrovert too. When I go to Starbucks to work, as I’m about to do, I look for excuses to chat, and being in a small town I *always* see people I know…it’s my water cooler.
*sidier note, my captcha is How Hansel, which makes me want to say ‘Hansel, he’s so hot right now.’
I have waaaaaaaaay too many virtual friends. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too many!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But some of them have become face-to-face friends.
At my first RWA conference I roomed with a woman I only knew from online. We had a number of mutual acquaintances, most of whom I only knew from online as well, but I felt comfortable accepting her offer of 1/4th of a hotel room. It worked out great!
Since then I’ve had face-to-face meetings with several online friends — writing friends, a friend from an online divorce support group, folks who share a love of a certain 1990’s era TV show.
It’s great to have the friends who live nearby. Please call me the day you decide to walk to Lynn’s house because I want to take photos. ::grin::
I’m a total introvert, but even I like to get out and mingle with *my* people. Not just any people. Lunch is important, especially if mojo is involved.
Yeah, it’s pretty cool to live so close and both write for the same wonderful line! And there’s pretty much not anything that would make you look fat. Puhleeze.
I need mojo too. We must do lunch soon!
Like Andrea, I’m typically an introvert. But, I’ve actually gotten more extroverted the older I get. So I need to see and be among people, but only for a short time before I can retreat again.
I have a lot of virtual friends, but once I joined my local RWA chapter (Aloha in Hawaii, and Heart of Dixie in AL) I made a lot of in-person friends.
Years ago, I scheduled a vacation with a virtual friend I’d only met once. She flew to Europe to meet me, and we traipsed around together for a week. We had a marvelous time, and in fact I saw her in DC last summer after not having seen her in person for about 10 years.
I am an Extrovert! Always have been and always will be. I speak to everyone and anyone, especially in Supermarket queues and have also been known to bop along to ‘musaq’ (much to the embarassment of my children who now hiss ’stop it’ at the first sign.)
The characters in my head are so ‘real’ I have ongoing conversations with them, more often than not asking them why the hell they did that!
Anyway, I digress – like Maisey I am part of a wonderful critique group who are going from strength to strength, becoming amazing friends who laugh and cry together. We are based in Australia, Canada, India, Greece, UK and USA (hope I haven’t missed anyone!) The time difference can be a challenge, but we manage to work around it. If it wasn’t for the internet, there is no way we would be able to post work and have such fast and useful feedback and encouragement. We’ve even had a published author pop in and sign her book (which was the prize in a little competition we ran.) We’re having a blast, but more importantly can see tangible improvements in our writing.
And we met on this blog after receiving the dreaded ‘R’ email. We will absolutely meet up at some point. Let me tell you, that will be one big party!
Christine
Oh Kim, you’ve just decribed my life. This morning I was sitting here in this very chair in my nightie checking my fave author loop (the one that keeps me sane) before I’d even had a cuppa tea, when my dear friend Amy Andrews called –Amy Andrews who has written a swag of beautiful medical romances for M&B and lives seven minutes from this very spot.
She gave me half an hour to get crackin’, and I dashed to meet her in a cafe and eat breakfast for a good ole goss and chat about the writing biz.
My fave start to a day!
Sometimes my need to chat is so extreme I’d drive to Alice Springs if anyone suggested it…
I’m sitting here nodding my head too. I’m not published (yet) but I’ve made so many friends since I’ve been writing romance and now I talk to them (shock horror) probably more than I talk to my non-writing friends.
And Anna – if you’re ever that desperate to talk, feel free to drive to Western Australia. I reckon I could listen to you talk romance ALL day!
How bout we meet halfway Rach–somewhere like say—
Echuca????
sounds like a universal issue!! And yeah, writing friends are invaluable. And Rach, Anna, if you’re traveling, Oregon’s not *that* much farther than Aus, is it?? *vbg*
I’ve made loads of ‘virtual’ friends over the Net, people I feel really close to but have never met. It’s so cool!
Anna, Echuca? I’m there
And Kim, isn’t OZ halfway between the US and UK taking a left?
You should all come here. Next August. For RWAus conference in Melbourne.
Make virtual a reality
Maisey — How cool that you met your crit group online! I found my CP through one of the RWA loops — the closest I’ve ever come to online dating!– and by the time we met IRL, she was already like a sister. (And yes, having your ed many hours ahead of you means interesting things in your inbox when you wake up!)
Andrea — it’s so hard for me to remember you’re an introvert. You’re downright chatty these days!
Lynn — lunch. Yes. As soon as I finish this book. (Which if I’m playing on the internet…)
Christine — how awesome your crit group bonded here after the dreaded R! What an awesome community here at iheart! I, too, will talk to anyone, anywhere — my introverted Geek-hubby is always asking “Do you *know* that person?” and is still surprised when I say no!
Rachel — I sometimes I forget that not everyone I meet is a writer! I love my non-writing friends, but I forget that not everyone is willing to plot at the drop of a hat!
Anna, Nic — pronounce “Echuca.” My Southern drawl just can’t figure out what that might be. Everything I try sounds like a sneeze…
Kim…For Echuca think Ee–then be prepared to rhyme with ‘puker.’ This comes very naturally to most Australians.
And Maisey–Oregon is certainly not much further from here than Western Australia. I’m thrilled to think you might fly out here for this happy bash. I feel sure Echuca would be delighted to see an international posse of authors sashaying down its celebrated streets. Oops sorry, I mean street.
Or there’s Sydney in August THIS year. The RWAus romance conference will be a heavenly sparkling party with–among others promising to attend–the divine Natalie Anderson!
Ah….RWAus..I’m still pouting because Nashville is too far for me.
Yep, Kim, I met my crit group right here after the FtH comp, after we found out none of us were among the winners.
Kimberly, Couldn’t agree more about the internet being the instant cure for those isolation blues. I would be completely lost without my critique partners–who often double as the hot-line professionals talking me down from some major spaz taking place on the fringe of my writing (ie- how will I ever hit my deadline with four sick kids home for five days!?!?!? or Why can’t my husband understand that I need the next fifty-six hours to be completely uninterrupted!??! Or HOW come I have to wait another year for Suzanne Brockmann’s next book to come out??!?!) And the water cooler chat on the author loops definitely keeps me from feeling like the hermit I sometimes threaten to become. So great to have these connections with people who understand where you are coming from and what you’re up against!
I love my net buddies, too – they’re the ones who know exactly what to say whether you’re having a brilliant day or a bad day
And I’ve got to meet some of them in person – either at the RNA conference, the RNA awards lunch, the M&B author lunch, or just meeting up with them for lunch (the nearest one to me, Meds and Romance author Caroline Anderson, is a good hour away, sadly – hmm, and how come most of these meet-ups involve food? What happened to my d**t?).
Anna – am v envious that you live so close to Amy! I was so pleased when she and her family came to the UK and came here for dinner. I made my special ice cream and cookies. (And healthy food, of course. Because I am such a good influence. Cough.) Course, you could always fly over here and I’d feed you said cookies for breakfast and a gossip…
Kimberly, I’d definitely be lost without my online writing buddies. Who else is going to be up and online at 1am when that last word has just been writ and you need to tell someone? What’s more, they’re instantly capable of correctly interpreting and responding to your incoherent babble with cyper champagne, chocolate and pretties. It’s so lovely!
Kate, I’m flying to London for a few days in May. Amy told me all about her lovely evening at your place, and the ice -cream. Sounds pretty good to me!
x
For a lot of freelancers, solo-preneurs, and and work-from-home professionals, the internet has become the equivalent of the watercooler. It’s the place where they get their daily interactions, support and network.
So we are all internet dependent for our friendships (and our sanity).